I Feel For You...when will you be cured?

just trying to unload.

I know you have been through a lot these days.

A month ago you had a car accident. got a scar and nine stitches on ur face. but you never saw even my shadow visiting you in the hospital. Nor a single message from me asking, how are you doing? Last week you celebrated your birthday. No greeting from me either. you sent me a goodnight message two nights ago. "who is this please?" was my reply. You replied only today, telling me its you and continued the message asking for an apology for all the blunders and telling me how you missed me. For the blunders, i said, its ok everyone has its shortcomings too. But you corrected me saying its not "its short-comings" but "their short-comings." When i've read it I felt a stubbing sensation in my chest. I opted not to reply. i might send a message that would add insult to injury.

They say time is a great healer. Now i beg to disagree. From where i'm standing you only get to be healed when you decided to be cured. I want to ask you when will you have that decision to be cured? I know i can never ask this in person. i'm not good in telling how i feel in person. Everytime i try i always felt a lump in my throat, preventing words to come out. Instead of words, tears will just spontaneuosly wells up in my eyes. Thats why i hate being confronted with emotions i know i can hardly handle. Aside from my immediate family, only few individuals really saw me sobbed. one, was my writer-friend who called me a crybaby and comforts me with a prayer. second, was my artist-friend who feels and understands my emotions. then the other one was a person who offended me the most. Even this person's shadow i cant stand.

Sure I know you have a good heart but may the kindness of your heart will not be contaminated with the bitterness you are feeling with the couple who caused you so much pain.

Yes I also missed you.

i missed the person i used to look up to
i missed the person who used to give me insights
i missed the person i whished to be like when grow up.

I feel for you as you are in the maze of your wild confusion.
I feel for you as you enter into your nights inscrutible.

My only hope dear one is for youn to be whole again.
Please be cured quickly.

Kaspersky!

the culprit why i'm having problem with viewing and sending messages....huhu. sometimes too much internet security is not also good.

excruciating night

last night was really terrible. i almost cant move because of pain. either stress related or my kidney reacted to my supplements. i drowned my self with wine hoping for the pain to flee. to my disappointment it lingers creating a terribly excruciating sensation. i was just thankful that after awhile the wine helped as a sedative. i slept earlier than my usual. more wine please! hehe

RIP Ted Kennedy

farewell and rest in peace Ted Kennedy a friend of Philippines democracy at some time in the past.

missing "starbucks"

the artist friend johnrichard made this artwork for us -"the starbuck experiene." starbucks intramuros is one of our favorite hangouts a.k.a our chat room/studyroom/assembly area/ etc. in the pictures are ate gwen(now mrs. castillo), itche (now mrs. buensoceso), tynee, abeth, and me.
I admit im a coffee junkie but what i really missed is the company of real friends i used to have when im in starbucks.hmmnnn... see you hopefully soooooon guys.

To my co-attempted writers!

To Jonathan/intellectual kuya: congrats to your PSS!
may you also get the NCCA young historians "rot-rot".hehe
LUCK! UGAT in the city!
To Jam/vongga!: Thanks for the overnight party! t'was sooo cool.
may the force be with you..regards sa mga abstract natin....cant wait for our second trip to sagada...kasama
kaba?

housemates

meet my present housemates/soon to be former housemates.hehe. love u guys. i cant imagine in a year of stay inside the campus, three times na pala akung nag transfer ng house. this time i'll be transferring to MSU- international house. hope this would be the last transfer.kopoy sige ug balhin.